Sometime ago I posted on my Facebook about how I never had an opportunity to really find a skin care regimen to really take care of my face. Turning 30 created a need for me to do this. These products are my go to skin care regimen and I am so happy with all of these products!
One thing that I literally cannot live without is my Clarisonic Mia 2. I like the Mia 2 because of the size, the fact that it has timed segments for 4 different parts of your face and when the time is up for the section you are working on it beeps at you. The two longest time segments are in the beginning so you concentrate the Clarisonic on your chin, upper lip and nose area first, then your forehead second, followed by two shorter time segments on both cheeks. Then you are done! I use this with the Philosophy Purity wash and it really gets all of the make-up, dirt and grime off of my face!
Speaking of Philosophy Purity, I have never found a face wash that I love as much as this one! A good face wash is very hard to come by. I love the fact that I can use it on my eye area as a make up remover and it removes make up better than any oil based product or towelette!
Now…in terms of moisturizer I have a couple different products that I use.
Night time Moisturizer: after using my clarisonic, I will use Josie Maran’s Argan Oil. I LOVE this product more than words can say! You can use it on your hair, rough elbows and feet and after it is applied it does not leave a slick oily residue on your skin. Before I found the other moisturizer that I am about to describe I would use it both day and night and never had an issue with my face looking oily throughout the day.
Daytime Moisturizer(s): Each and every morning before I put on my make up I use Origins GinZing eye cream. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE it!!! It has a pink tone to it and a bit of shimmer, that totally wakes your tired eyes up! Literally! It has caffeine in it and I really have an issue with my eyes looking puffy and tired in the am and I swear this is a miracle product!
After using the eye cream I smooth on some of the GinZing energy boosting moisturizer and it gives my face a good smooth canvas to put make up on, whether minimally or a full face. Added Plus…it smells AMAZING!!! If you like citrus smells you will LOVE this product!
Once a week: I use The Microdelivery Triple Acid Brightening Peel pads from Philosophy to remove dead skin cells, tighten and brighten my face. These pads are pre-saturated so all you have to do is sweep it over your entire face, excluding the eye area, and let dry. I do this every Sunday night before I go to bed. It will leave somewhat of a tacky sticky feel on your face so by the time you wake up in the morning that feeling is gone. I have noticed a big change with my overall face coloration and removal of dark spots with this product!
The best thing about ALL of these products are that they can be used on all skin types and are from very environmentally friendly/conscious companies. Totally happy with these products and I am SO glad that I found them as you always should put your best face forward…going into my 30′s I definitely need a little help here.
What comes to mind when you hear December? Christmas? Gifts? The Birth of Christ? Santa Claus? Elf on the Shelf? Crazy Shoppers? Family????
For me, the latter of that list is what I identify with when I think of December. This term, “family” has changed it’s meaning for me in the last five years. I used to believe that family was something that you were born into. That it was constant, reliable and unwavering. I spent 25 years of believing I had the perfect family, and one single event that would set a chain reaction in motion to blow that perception I had straight to hell. Now, looking back I see that I lived in a state of naivete as the signs of people’s true colors were always there, I just never wanted to acknowledge them.
Here I sit, nearly five years later and on the eve of my superman’s (grandpa’s) birthday and I can’t help but feel a little defeated. Somehow I feel like by letting go, I will have failed him somehow for not keeping this heaping mess in tact. Then reality sets in and a much clearer mindset comes back and reminds me what I have learned in the past five years.
1.) I am only responsible for my own feelings. No one can make me feel a certain way without me allowing them to do so.
2.) I am not responsible for “saving” grown-ass adults. These other individuals were raised by the exact same wonderful people as I was, and what they chose to take away from that experience is their own issue. I can’t nor wont be responsible for how they chose to eff-up their own lives. You made your bed? Lie in it. You have something to say? Grow some nuts and say it out loud or take some prune juice and let that shit go.
3.) I will never diminish myself or my accomplishments in life to make someone else feel better. If they are unhappy with who they have become, well tough shit. You should have made better choices, you have the same number of hours in the day, and guess what…you’re not dead so you still have time to make yourself and your life better and more fulfilling.
4.) My morals and ideals are not wrong because I am purely a minority for holding them. I went to college, moved in with my fiancé (at the time), got married, bought a house, then had a child. (Somewhere in there managed to raise someone else’s teenager in the interim) “To each there own.” I could care less if someone has a child and is not married BUT if you are not even able to take care of yourself physically, emotionally or financially and you are bringing innocent children into this world you best stop feeling sorry for yourself and go hustle your ass off for that kid because they didn’t ask to be born to bums.
5.) I truly need to stop doing things out of the “kindness of my own heart” for those who would gladly kick me when I am down instead of reciprocate the same sort of kindness I have exhibited. Self explanatory. At the end of the day, some people are worth helping more than others and being related by blood isn’t necessary a good enough qualifier in my book anymore.
6.) Love people for who they are and understand that most people are not capable of change but merely suppression. Who we are is practically ingrained into us. We may be able to suppress who we are at times, for various reasons but I don’t necessarily feel that we can just up and change our ways. In the rare times that it does happen it doesn’t come without some sort of great struggle, loss or defeat. This is one of the hardest lessons I have ever had to learn because I so desperately want to believe that people can change, I have just never seen it done for the better in my lifetime.
7.) Save yourself. If you don’t take care of you, there may be no one else willing to do it. While I don’t say abandon all hope of ever helping someone else, just make sure that you are well taken care of before that attempt. You cannot help someone else when you are conflicted yourself.
8.) Family is not who you are bound to by genetics. Family is any person who has earned the right to be a part of your life, who enriches it with their mere presence, no strings attached, here for the long haul, whether you end up at the pearly gates or down in the depths fanning the flames of hell together you know that no matter what, you’re in it together.
My grandfather was a passionate man. Much like myself he would give anything he was passionate about 150%. What I failed to see growing up is that he was a happy and fulfilled man not because he spent a lot of time trying to keep everyone in the family together, but that he didn’t try to hold onto things that did not serve him or his happiness. He let it go, without exhibiting the slightest notion that it bothered him. Why? Because he was content with who he considered family, knowing that a select few would be there for him as much as he was there for them and at the end of the day, why would you need anything else but that?
So on the eve of his birthday I honor his memory by exhibiting one of the best practices that he taught me by saying, “Ces’t La Fucking Vie.” There were some good times, mostly good for others at my expense…The good times continue with my own little family and after 5 years of trying to juggle this jumbled mess of what’s left of my childhood family I drop the heavy plates I juggle, just to watch them shatter and can’t help but feel better today than I have ever. I wish them no ill will. I wish them the best of luck and love always but I always wish that they stay far, far away from me. My December marks a new way of life.
Bleeding hearts of the world unite! We all have at the least, that one person in our lives that we will go over and beyond for. If you don’t, well then you are the d-bag that this blog is talking about. This “all or nothing” with helping someone is in my nature so it practically applies to any friend or family member, or at least it did.
While many have found me to be harsh, one doesn’t become that way without some help. I have found a delicate balance is necessary, in recent years between going over and beyond for someone and allowing them to deal with their self made problems on their own. I used to go all out for others, only to find out they would not do the same, and then in retaliation light an inferno to the relationship bridge after giving the other party a very spirited middle finger and smug smile before doing so.
Now, despite fighting my natural instincts to rush to someone’s aid, I have to sit back and let them figure it out. If there is a tragedy beyond someone’s control, by all means I am all in and will rush to anyone’s side in a moment of need. But…if someone who continually finds themselves in bad predicaments due their own lack of common sense, better judgment OR plain defiance because they KNOW someone will save them…well it’s time to sink or swim hun. This tactic is better known as “tough love”
I no longer find sympathy for anyone who has continually made a mess of their lives and cannot find the strength to overcome it. I could have easily learned to be the victim in my life with being born into a tragic situation. I could have blamed “god” or the world for taking my dad’s life so young. I could have chosen to see that every curve ball life has thrown at me was a personal attack on “God’s wretched vendetta” against me instead of viewing it (during) as a problem to be solved and (after) as another instance in which I grew stronger as a person.
I used to feel sorry for people who made a mess of their lives and felt that if someone gave them a helping hand they would magically take that random act of kindness and grow as a person as the result of being gracious for a helping hand, because that is how I always felt I would respond when and if I ever got a helping hand.
That is truly not the case for a lot of these prototypes. These people who live from one self made tragedy to the next use helping hands until that stream runs dry and then go looking for the next. If these individuals are of relation to you, you can choose to continue helping (enabling) or you can choose not to, and take the route of “tough love” where you can love and support them emotionally but not tie that to anything of numerical value.
In many cases, you then become known openly as the “asshole.” Just know that you were actually always perceived as the “asshole” you were just the “dependable asshole” who the perpetually victimized would mock behind your back but smile in your face. This happens for no reason other than, while their disdain for your personal success and/or happy life is deep rooted, they still find their relationship with you, as fake as it may be, to be advantageous to them.
So I say to you, bleeding hearts of the world, protect yourself and go with your better judgment as there is a thin line between Love and enablement. Be selective with who you lend yourself to. While there are people out there who truly need a helping hand, there are a lot who are not worth the heartache of helping in the end. While you should not help someone with the expectation that they will some day return the favor, you should at least know that if the other person had the ability to ever return the favor, they would. If you feel that someone would not help you if you were drowning and they had the ability to, then respectfully decline and move on.
Remember that you have your own life to live. You do not want to look back at the end and realize that you did not do the things that you enjoyed nearly enough because you spent so much time trying to save someone who was hell-bent on being a lifetime victim.
Anyone who has ever worked on ships has, without a doubt, worked with dozens of Filipinos. They are our co-workers, our friends and our family.
Over the weekend our ship life paisanos were faced the devastating destruction of their home. One of the strongest storms in recorded history, Typhoon Haiyan, killed an estimated 10,000 people. To put that number into perspective combine the casualties from Hurricane Katrina, Hurricane Sandy and 9/11… and double it.